The Magic of Goal Setting (And Why Your Dreams Aren't as Far Away as You Think)
Have you ever noticed how when you're thinking about buying a red car, suddenly red cars are everywhere? Or how when you learn a new word, you start hearing it in every conversation?
That's not coincidence, that's your brain's Reticular Activating System (RAS) at work and it's the scientific secret behind why goal setting actually works.
The Science Behind Manifestation
Let me demystify something that often gets dismissed as "woo-woo": manifestation has a neurological basis. Your RAS is a network of neurons in your brainstem that acts like a filter, determining what information gets your conscious attention and what gets ignored. Every second, you're bombarded with millions of pieces of sensory information, and your RAS decides what's important enough to notice.
Here's where it gets powerful.
Your RAS doesn't distinguish between "real" goals and random thoughts. When you clearly define what you want and consistently focus on it, you're essentially programming your RAS to spot opportunities, resources, and connections that align with that goal. You're not magically attracting things into your life. You're training your brain to notice what was always there.
This is why goal setting isn't just about writing down dreams. It's about activating your brain's natural filtering system to work for you instead of against you.
My Story: From Burnout to Breakthrough
I need to be honest with you. I know this works because I lived it.
I was once trapped in a toxic job that was slowly draining every ounce of energy I had. The environment was negative, my contributions weren't valued, and the stress didn't stop when I left the office. It followed me home, into my relationships, into my sleep. I was irritable, exhausted, and started questioning my own worth. Sound familiar?
I knew something had to change, but I felt stuck. The job market seemed impossible. I didn't have the energy to apply anywhere. And honestly? I'd convinced myself that maybe this was just how work was supposed to feel.
But here's what shifted everything: I stopped focusing on escaping and started focusing on thriving.
The Reset That Changed Everything
First, I prioritised my wellbeing. Not as a luxury, as a non-negotiable. I started small. This included morning walks, reconnecting with friends I'd been too "busy" for. I needed to feel like myself again before I could envision something better.
Then, I got clear on my goals. Not just "get a new job," but specific criteria:
A supportive team environment where collaboration was valued
Opportunities for genuine growth and learning
A culture that respected work-life boundaries
A role where I could make meaningful contributions
I wrote these down. I visualised what my ideal workday would look like. I talked about it with trusted friends. Without realising it, I was programming my RAS.
Here's where the magic happened: I started noticing opportunities I would have scrolled past before. A former colleague mentioned her company was hiring. A LinkedIn post about a role caught my eye, not because it was new, but because suddenly I was seeing it through the lens of my goals.
Within two weeks of getting clear and taking aligned action, I had an interview.
I didn't get that job. And honestly? I was disappointed. But here's what I did get: incredible feedback about my strengths, confidence that I was on the right track, and proof that I was worthy of the opportunities I was seeking. That interview wasn't a failure. It was evidence that my RAS was working.
The next opportunity came shortly after. I interviewed with clarity, confidence, and a deep knowing of what I brought to the table. I got the role. And it transformed everything.
The Transformation Was Total
It wasn't just about having a better job title or a nicer manager (though both were true). My entire wellbeing shifted. I had energy again. I was present with my loved ones. I felt proud of my work. I remembered what it felt like to wake up excited rather than dreading the day ahead.
My health improved, better sleep, fewer tension headaches, actually wanting to move my body. My confidence came back, not because someone gave it to me, but because I remembered I'd always had it.
Your Dreams Are Closer Than You Think
Here's what I want you to understand: this isn't a special story. This is available to you too.
Your dreams aren't as far away as you think. They're just hidden behind unclear goals and a RAS that's been programmed to keep you safe in the familiar (even when the familiar is making you miserable).
When you combine self-care with clear goal setting and aligned action, you're not just hoping for change. You're neurologically priming yourself to notice and seize the opportunities that will get you there.
And here's the beautiful thing: this approach works for so many facets of life. Maybe you're wanting to improve your relationships, build healthier habits, grow your confidence in social situations, create more financial freedom, or find a community where you truly belong. The same process applies, prioritise your wellbeing, get clear on what you want, programme your RAS, and take aligned action. Whether it's your career, your health, your relationships, or your personal growth, your brain's filtering system doesn't discriminate. It simply finds what you tell it to look for.
A Confidence-Building Method I Use With Clients
One of the most powerful tools I share with my clients is what I call the "Evidence Journal" method. It's simple but genuinely transformative for building unshakeable confidence.
Here's how it works:
Each day, write down three pieces of evidence that support your goal or the person you're becoming. These can be tiny wins, positive feedback, moments where you showed up for yourself, or even just noticing an opportunity that aligns with your vision.
For example, when I was shifting out of that toxic job, my evidence looked like:
"I set a boundary and didn't work overtime"
"I felt energised after my morning walk instead of immediately stressed"
Why does this work? Because your brain loves evidence. When you consistently show yourself proof that you're moving forward, your RAS pays even more attention. Your confidence grows not from positive affirmations alone, but from genuine evidence that you're already becoming the person who achieves those goals.
This is something I work through with every single one of my clients, and the shift is always remarkable. They stop waiting for confidence to appear and start building it deliberately, one piece of evidence at a time.
Your Action Steps
Ready to activate your own RAS? Here's where to start:
Prioritise your wellbeing first. You can't build a dream life from a depleted foundation. What's one small thing you can do today to care for yourself?
Get crystal clear on what you want. Not what you're running from, its what you're running towards. Write down specific, vivid details.
Start your Evidence Journal. Grab a notebook and commit to writing three pieces of evidence daily. Watch your confidence grow as you collect proof of your progress.
Take aligned action. Not just any action, but steps that genuinely move you towards your goal. Your RAS will help you spot them.
Trust the process. Not every opportunity will be "the one," but each one is building your confidence and refining your vision.
The magic isn't in wishing. It's in the beautiful combination of neuroscience, self-care, and intentional action. And it's absolutely within your reach.
What goal are you going to programme your RAS for today?
Jacqueline xx
Ready to transform your wellbeing and step into the confident, intentional life you deserve? Want accountability to realise your goals. Let's work together to get you there.